Some people even wonder if they made a mistake. Here are some other possible reasons divorced couples consider remarrying one another. Before you remarry your ex, you need to be sure you are both ready for the work involved because it won't be easy. And, statistically speaking, the odds are against you.
For instance, second marriages often end in divorce more often than first marriages. In fact, according to Psychology Today " If you and your ex-spouse are committed to the idea of getting back together, you need to remember these three things:. If you are committed to remarrying your former spouse, you should plan on being in a loving relationship for a minimum of a year before tying the knot again.
During that time, you need to address the reasons why you divorced in the first place. After all, you are marrying the same person. While you both may have experienced some personal growth since the divorce, there still will be things about your ex that annoy you.
Here are some suggestions to improve your chances of having a successful second marriage to one another. Marriage counselors agree that you must learn from your marital history or the two of you are doomed to repeat the same mistakes. Unresolved and unfinished business will resurface.
If the marriage failed because of finances, be clear on how you will spend money. If problems revolved around parenting issues, work this conflict out first.
If the divorce was due to infidelity , process the unfaithfulness, forgive, and rebuild trust. You also may want to read a marriage book together and take a marriage workshop or course.
The more work you do on the front end of your relationship, the better off you will be after you remarry. Building a new foundation takes time and effort. You have to confront past issues that caused conflict and learn new ways of interacting.
When divorce happens, no one is blameless. Even if infidelity was the primary reason for the divorce, there are bound to be other issues in the marriage. And while those issues do not excuse the unfaithfulness nor can they be blamed for it, they still need to be addressed.
Admit to your role and responsibility in what went wrong in your first marriage. If you can't readily do this, you will continue to struggle in this marriage. You also need to keep things completely honest between the two of you. There should be no game playing, no mind reading, and no unspoken expectations. Share with one another your hopes, dreams, and expectations. Getting back together just for the sake of the kids is a bad idea. Get back together because you love and like one another and want to be together again.
If you do have children, don't let them know you're dating again for a while. They could get their hopes up that you will reconcile. These hopes also could put pressure on you to remarry even if things are not going as well as you would like. Should a remarriage be in the offering then God will provide all the power. However, I do not say should seek this or put your hopes in reunification with your former husband, for these instances are rare, and always come with a great and continuing cost.
Yes, the reuniting of something so broken is never a fairy tale, but often times, proves exceptionally hard work for the heart. I hope this answer helps you to find peace with God through Jesus Christ. If you want to know more about what Jesus has done for you please watch the video on the main part of our site: Watch the video. I encourage you to attend a local Bible believing church and speak to the leader about your question.
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If you are outside of the UK then you may submit your request for prayer on line at www. If you can't find an answer to your question, please ask us instead. Is it a sin to continue loving my ex-husband? We are still in close contact though he doesn't suggest getting back together.
What should I do? Jeremiah here assumes that the audience for this prophecy is familiar with the law in Deuteronomy: If a man divorces his wife and she remarries, he may not take her back, at the risk of corrupting the land. As noted above, Jeremiah takes it for granted that the principle behind this law would apply in a case of adultery as well as in cases of divorce. A woman cannot return to her former or current husband after being with another man because the latter sexual relationship defiles her for him.
This text views the situation from the perspective of the first husband and presumes that he ought to feel repulsed at returning to his wife after she has slept with another man. Laws regulating sexual behavior may be based on ideas about rights, obligations, and justice, or they may be based on purity and taboo. The Torah contains both types of laws. From a purely logical perspective, this law or my interpretation of it poses problems.
If sex with another man contaminates a woman for her husband, why is it permissible for a divorced woman—or, for that matter, a widow or any non-virgin—to re marry at all? And why does this law prohibit the woman only from remarrying her first husband, and not from marrying any other man? Yet the law makes some intuitive sense when viewed in terms of the feelings this situation might generate.
If the first husband were to remarry his former spouse, the second marriage could be seen as having interrupted an ongoing relationship, introducing something foreign. Please support us. The first husband is prohibited from taking his former wife back after she has been defiled, i.
This interpretation is found in Sifre , where it is attributed to R. Yose b. Sara Japhet Jerusalem: Magnes, , pp. This has led scholars to the consensus that the authors of Jeremiah had access to some version of Deuteronomy. Biblical verses supporting this interpretation include Jeremiah , Isaiah , and Job Note also the use of purity and pollution language to describe the effect of adultery on a woman in Num —31 the law of the sotah.
The laws in Deuteronomy —29 are mostly justice based. Pressler notes that, as it deals with purity, this law may not be possible to understand fully.
Eve Levavi Feinstein holds a Ph. I would like to receive new essays When published Before Shabbat. Torah Portion. This Week's Torah Portion. Genesis Exodus Leviticus Numbers Deuteronomy. Rosh Hashanah Rosh Hashanah. Yom Kippur Yom Kippur. Sukkot Sukkot. Simchat Torah Simchat Torah. Chanukah Chanukah. Purim Purim.
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